Wednesday, October 15, 2014

This is NEW

Today is the beginning of something new, my first BLOG post. This is going to be an outlet for myself, a way to deal with grief and just everyday life in general. You will get an insight on my journey with Huntington’s Disease and trying to find ways to deal with my anxiety and depression issues. If you are not aware to what Huntington’s Disease is please click on  ” What is HD?” & “About Me” on the right side of the page.
I am somewhat of a quiet person, I really don’t talk a lot. I find it much easier to write it all down. When I do have conversations with others I feel as if what I am thinking in my head is not what comes out of my mouth. A lot of people don’t know what I am going through, including some family. Some just think I have became cold, because of social withdrawal. I don’t feel comfortable around a lot of people, I honestly feel as if I am underwater and cant breath. I rarely leave the house other than taking my kids to school. Home is my safe place, with my Husband and our Boys. With that being said it doesn’t mean that I don’t love the rest of my family because I do, I love each and every one of them more than they will ever know. I was told by a family member that “Actions speak louder than words.” I have yet to explain to him how I feel and what I go through each and every day.
I don’t want people to feel sorry for me, or think I just use it all as an excuse, because I don’t. I just want others to know that I didn’t choose to be this way and with HD it wont get any better. My Husband understands that and he is my rock, I really don’t know where I would be without him.  He knows that my anxiety and depression are from the Huntington’s. Tonight we were lying on the couch watching TV together, he looked at me and said “Sometimes you act like your not even there.”  I told him that I know, because I do feel that way a lot, and I told him that he needed to tell that to my new Neurologist when we go next month.I have noticed the changes in myself over the last couple years, I think that my Husband is just piecing it all together.
Hoping and praying to find out some answers soon.
Until next time.

1 comment:

  1. I am praying for you Erica. My husband became symptomatic about 5yrs ago. I pray for you all. Let's beat this dreadful disease.