Thursday, October 16, 2014

That Time Again

This time four years ago I was at the nursing home with my Dad and Family. He had been hospitalized and put in ICU a couple weeks prior due to pneumonia and the fluid build up in his lungs from the progression of the Huntington's Disease. I just remember the look of fear in his eyes, fear that I had never seen in him before. 

When Dad tested positive for HD he had a living will made up in front of a lawyer, with a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) it was his wish to not have anything prolonging his life. I know deep down he done this because of all the years he watched his Mother suffer in the nursing home. 

October 14, we had a meeting with Dad's Doctor. My Step Mom, Sister, Brother, Husband and I, we all sat there and listened to the words we knew where coming to soon. "There is nothing else we can do for Jeff, his lungs are filling up with fluid and it is as if he is drowning." With this being said the emotions did hit us all, we made the decision to have him sent back to the nursing home on Hospice care. Over the next three days family came into say there goodbye's and we all prayed that God would just take him and end his suffering. We stayed around his bed, letting him know it was okay to go Home. I will never forgot when my Step Mom, Shona told us all to get up and come over by the window to pray. As we stood there and prayed, our back turned to Dad's hospital bed he took his last breath. He didn't want to go with us watching him. 

Sometimes it's hard to remember him before HD, but the memories I do have I will cherish forever. I feel at peace knowing he doesn't have to suffer anymore. I couldn't be selfish and want him back even though I miss him more than words can explain. I am beyond grateful that he had the chance to meet his Grandson's. Luke was just a baby but Taylor does remember his "Papaw Jeff" he talks about him often.

Dad was a proud Veteran and felt honored to have severed in the Army for his country.

 He enjoyed being outdoors, hunting, fishing or just mowing the lawn. I remember the long walks we would take on my Grandpas farm.
Then every moment after HD

No comments:

Post a Comment